


I Hate Knowing What I Couldn't Have Done

by Zatterson



Category: Blindspot (TV)
Genre: F/F, Patterson is in a coma, kinda Patterson/Tasha, tasha blames herself, the Doctor is cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-12
Updated: 2018-02-15
Packaged: 2019-03-04 01:44:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13353891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zatterson/pseuds/Zatterson
Summary: Patterson is in the hospital in a coma and Tasha struggles without her.(I'm bag at summaries please read)





	1. Helpless against nature

“Oh Patterson…” Tasha whispered, gently stroking the side of the scientist’s face. The blond lay unresponsive in her hospital bed, the only sign that she was still alive the rhythmic beeping of her heart monitor and the slight rise and fall of her chest with her soft breaths. 

The same measured beeping had been the only sound in the bland room since the others had left at the doctor’s instruction. Technically, even Tasha wasn't supposed to be there, but then again, she had never been very good at listening. 

She must have fallen asleep because the next thing she knew a tall, olive skinned man in a lab coat was looking at the seemingly thousands of monitors Patterson was hooked up to. She watched him scribble down the data for a few moments before he realized she was awake. “Didn't I tell you to go home last night?” He asked, his tone light. The brunette yawned and gave him a halfhearted shrug. He laughed in the same light tone he had used before. “But seriously you should go home and get some rest.” He saw her shoot a glance at the blonde in front of them. “I can almost promise she'll still be here when you get back.” The brunette nodded slowly. “Thank you…” She trailed off not know his name. “Dr. Kamal,” he said quickly. Tasha smiled. “Thank you Dr. Kamal,” she said, and left.

 

“I told you you'd get caught,” Reade said to her as he drove her home, “but then again I'm sure you didn't care.” He took a glance at her, staring out the window onto the rainy New York streets. “Hey,” he said, putting a hand on her leg, “she's gonna be ok.” The brunette looked over at her friend painfully, tears welling in her chocolate brown eyes. “I could have saved her I could have… I could have gotten there faster I could have taken her place!” Reade cut her off swiftly. “No, Tash. You couldn't,” he said, pulling the car into the parking garage, “there was no way you could have know what was going to happen. You couldn't have done anymore then you did.” She nodded slowly, looking at him, a pained expression on her tear-stained face, but he could tell she didn't believe it.

******She crept through the dimly lit warehouse, the only sound the rhythmic dropping of water on the concrete floor. Suddenly, a high woman’s voice cut through the silence. Patterson. The brunette picked up her pace, following the sound of her friends voice. The warehouse got lighter as she went. A soft, flickering light. There was a fire. She was running now, the acrid smell of smoke and lack of voices frightening her greatly. After a few more moments, she saw the fire. It was bigger than she had expecting and growing quickly. She saw a figure passed out on the floor and for a moment her heart stopped. It was Patterson. She was dead.******


	2. Almost Promises

“Tasha. Tasha wake up!!” Reade said, shaking her awake. She woke up with a start, her breathing coming in short, raspy breaths. Slowly she became more aware of her surroundings. She was in Reade’s apartment, on the couch, her body covered in cold sweat and a thin blanket. “Patterson?” She asked breathlessly. “Patterson’s ok,” Reade assured her, gently trying to lower her back to the couch. But she wasn't going to be persuaded that easily. “Take me to her,” the brunette said blatantly, firmly. “Tash you need to rest. You can't help until you help yourself,” he said with equal resolve in his voice. She touched the bandages covering her arm and leg. She had been burned trying to find Patterson in the fire. She had collapsed near where Patterson had been buried alive. Where Patterson had slipped into a coma from smoke inhalation.

After another forty-five minute nap Tasha convinced Reade to take her back to the hospital. Jane and Weller were there when the pair got there. “How is she?” The brunette asked as soon as she entered the room. “Hello to you to Zapata,” Kurt said his voice friendly. Tasha rolled her eyes and turned to Jane. “How is she?” Jane laughed, the sound filling the room with positivity. “She's doing great,” a new voice said. Dr. Kamal. “I thought I told you to go home,” the doctor said walking over to check the blondes monitors again. “I did go home,” she said, not taking her eyes off her friend. “It didn't seem like very long,” he said, scribbling in the quick way only doctors could. “How is she?” Tasha asked impatiently. “I told you,” he said, incredible at multitasking, “besides being in a coma she fine.” Tasha chose that moment to let it all out. “Then why isn't she conscious!?” She snapped, almost yelling. Reade tried to calm her down but she wiggled away from him. “If she's fine why isn't she here?” She was crying now, the tears falling hot down her pale face. The young man across from her looked up, his face filled with empathy and understanding. “The chemical asphyxiants and low oxygen messed with her brain,” he said gently, his voice soft, “even though her body is fine her brain needs time to heal.” Tasha took a deep breath, her gaze falling upon the young woman in the bed in front of her, her long blonde hair splayed out on the pillow. “Will her brain ever heal?” She asked weakly. The doctor put a hand on her shoulder. “Of that I'm almost sure.”

After that, she spent most of her waking day in the hospital. Sometimes she read to Patterson, sometimes she talked to her, and sometimes she just sat there and watched her breathe, the slow rise and fall of her chest the only sign in the sterile room of life outside the beeping of machines.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter is so short, I just thought this was a good place to wrap it up. New chapters coming next week.


	3. Time to Go

It had been three weeks since the initial accident. Tasha's burns had mostly healed, leaving scars as an everlasting reminder of what she almost lost. Unfortunately, Patterson had not healed as well. Most of the machines she had been originally hooked up to had been retired from her room, leaving the heart monitor the only machine left in the room. Somehow, that made the room feel even more ominous.

It was her first week back after taking some time off to take care of Patterson. The first week back was always the hardest. Reade had asked her if she needed any more time but she refused. “I need to go back,” she said as she pulled up her chocolate hair. He shot her a look that said “are you sure” which she returned with her signature glare. He smiled at her, glad to have his Tasha back.

Three weeks after coming back to the office, Tasha got a call. “Ms. Zapata?” A high voice asked. “Yeah?” Tasha said, holding up a hand to Reade to signify she needed to take this. “This is Dr. DaCoral from Brans Hospital, Ms. Patterson has awaken and is asking for you.” Tasha stood in stunned silence for a moment. “She's- she's awake?” Tasha said sitting down a look of excitement and maybe fear on her face. “Yes ma'am,” Dr. DaCoral assured her, “if you could get here quickly she's getting anxious.” Tasha nodded to no one. “I'll be- be right there.” She grabbed her coat and hustled out the door.

Tasha was there in a second. She basically ran to Patterson’s room on the fourth floor, almost bursting through the door, but she paused. She was scared. Scared Patterson wouldn’t be the same amazing person she had been before. She took a deep breath and walked in. Immediately, the weight on her chest was lifted. The blonde was sitting up in bed, joking with the nurse as she checked some monitors. Tasha watched for a moment before Patterson realized she was there. “Tasha!” She shrieked, trying to jump out of bed then realizing where she was. “Hey,” Tasha said, walking over to the bed on sitting down, “I’ve missed you so much.” She hugged the blonde, putting her ear against her chest to hear her heartbeat. To know she was alive. Patterson smiled and kissed her head. “I’ve missed you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took this long. Volleyball has got me pretty booked. Hopeyou enjoyed

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for everyone who persuaded me to write this. Without you guys I wouldn't be writing.


End file.
